And The Stars Were Burning Brightly by Danielle Jawando

Author : Danielle Jawando

Title : And the Stars Were Burning Brightly

Published : 2020
Publisher : Simon & Schuster
Pages : 400
Genre : Young Adult / Mental Health

     When fifteen-year-old Nathan discovers that his older brother Al, has taken his own life, his whole world is torn apart. Al was special. Al was talented. Al had so many dreams ... so why did he do it? Convinced that his brother was in trouble, Nathan decides to retrace Al’s footsteps. As he does, he meets Megan, Al's former classmate, who is as determined as Nathan to keep Al's memory alive. 

Together they start seeking answers, but will either of them be able to handle the truth about Al’s death when they eventually discover what happened?

     And The Stars Were Buring Brightly is a book that will stay with me long after I turned the last page. It has taken me a good long while to put all my thoughts into some sort of order to be able to even write this review. Given the subject matter, I would be surprised if you came out the other side lightly. It is fair to say that this book above and beyond any other I have read this year took me on such a heart-aching journey as that of Nathan and Megan. It is also one that is worth reading the blurb before going into as I feel the topics discussed in its pages will be very difficult for some to deal with. 

     I suppose that when someone we love takes there own life, we all set off on a journey to try and find out why. The burning million dollar question, How could we have not seen it coming. Surely we would have done something to try and stop it. It is a mixture of shock and this dirty little selfish feeling of how could they. But too often we cannot begin to understand those feelings if we have not been in those footsteps our selves. For Al, his mind is so full of such thoughts that nothing can shut them out. a constant downpour of self-loathing and hatred all directed inwards. As I read these passages I could feel the walls closing in around me this dark world envelops everything it touches. For me, it was so remarkable how the author captured those feelings. It is both a scary and dangerous place to find yourself in. Nathan and Megan, they are left with that question a burning hole at the center of Al's life. Their grief and loss are like a puzzle without a box, how can you start to put it together not knowing what the whole picture looks like. Their feelings became mine as I was pulled with them from one gut-wrenching moment to the next.  These are characters you can truly connect with and take into your life. They live and breathe every moment of the existence shining so bright in the darkest of times. 

      As you can imagine this is a book that lives in some of the saddest and darkest moments of anyone's life. There is such raw honesty to be found coming from these people it is hard to look away. Yet at times I had to, it becomes so overwhelming as we delve it to the events leading up to Al's suicide. It's strange thing to say but for all its brutalness, the author writes with such care and beauty. The emotions that her charters go through are made real for us to become one with, Nathans's anger, Megan's loss, and Al's suffering pour off the page with such ease, that it is wonder how she manages to make it seem so effortless. This for me was a book that took on a very difficult subject and did not play it for effect. Rather she gives it to us in real terms. These are events people go through every day and keep to themselves. This is for sure a journey that will take its toll on you as a reader. I was left feeling battered and bruised by my experience with this book. It is, however, one I would not give up on. This is one of those books that is so important to read. And I think in part this is also down to its characters. The act and behave as people of there age should. Their emotions are left bare and they act on instinct. 

     There is so much more I could talk about when it comes to And The stars Were Burning Brightly, But firstly I could never take that away fro a prospective reader and secondly even now I'm still trying to put my own emotions into place when it comes to this book. It is a beautifully honest book about a subject none of us really want to talk about. But it is something we should and maybe this book might just start a few conversations along the way and save a life here or there?